What I feel is personal. In the long run it was Sandy’s choice, but I still to this day regret not discussing it more. There are certainly a lot of ‘what ifs’ and ‘could have beens’, but that doesn’t make the hurt go away. Two years later, Mae came along. The same feeling s of guilt haunted me. I had great wife and two beautiful daughters, but I grieved just the same. And again, time dulled the feeling, we lived a happy life, I would get passed this somehow. Sara was a great mother, she balanced the girls, a career and me. Sometimes she referred to me as her oldest child, and at times I did require more attention than my daughters. But Sara was always was able to give me all the love and support I needed. The children grew older, and became quite a handful for us both. It was clear that they were headstrong and free thinkers. It was hard to keep track of them, they didn’t seem to want help with anything. We learned to keep an eye on them, but let them explore without butting in too. I wasn't a bad looking fella, it's just that I really never had luck with women. I was your average tall, lanky and quiet gentleman. Women were not a big part of my life, but being in my early thirties I still felt I had a chance to meet a nice woman one day. I was a lonely man but at least I had a good job that was slowly sucking the life out of me.Well back to my strange story, I decided to get out of my car and walk to the nearest payphone to see if I could call up my brother Jimmy, or my friend Tony. I just wanted to get home one way or another; I'd worry about the car later. As I began to walk down a long lonely path, my hands quivered and my knees were shaky. Not only was I scared but also I was cold as hell. This path was a strange path too. Never in my life had I even seen this path.I'd live in this small Texas town my entire life and this road was a strange looking road. Maybe there had been places in my town I'd never seen. Only owls and other strange birds could be heard up.
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